WARNING: This post is sexual.

Somebody needs to just come out and say it: Barefoot running is sexy.

When people talk about barefoot running, they tend to discuss things like heel strikes and mid-food landings and foot anatomy. But the real foot facts tell a more exciting story.

DID YOU KNOW?

  • The network of nerves that stimulate your feet are the same network that are present in your genitals. The sensory neurons in your feet are so powerful that a minor tickle can send your entire body into an uncontrollable spasm.
  • The sensation on your feet is equivalent to the sensation on your lips and fingertips.
  • Only your face and hands compare to your feet when it comes to the delivering instant sensory messages to your brain.
  • Our pulse is very easily palpitated in specific parts of the body that are also linked with sensual pleasure. Our necks. Our wrists. Our genitals. And not one, but TWO spots in our feet: the Dorsal Pedis Artery and the Posterior Tibial Artery. One is at the ankle and the other on the top base of your foot. These are your pressure points. Go ahead. Have a feel. You know you want to.

SEX AND TORTURE AND YOUR FEET

The sexual implications of feet go way back.

In the book of Ruth in the Bible, the widow Ruth does one thing to seduce a man named Boaz: she creeps up to him while he is asleep and uncovers his feet.

I’m not sure what the cultural significance of this was at the time. I have come across several theories, but nothing completely reliable. Boaz’s reaction, however, is clear: He married Ruth. (Ruth 3:6-7)

Like most things associated with pleasure, our feet are also associated with pain. During the Spanish Inquisition, South American dictators developed a torture technique called the bastinado. This technique later became a favourite of Saddam Hussein’s son, Uday. It was so simple but extremely painful. Essentially, it was the act of tying people down and beating the soles of their feet.

IT’S OK. BE NAUGHTY.

I personally believe that barefoot running has such a huge following because of these kinds of connections. Yes, running barefoot helps with form. Yes, it helps with injury. But it also just FEELS sooooo damn good!

Our feet hitting the ground like that and stimulating our senses is like running on crack. And that’s okay. We should immediately add that to our list of benefits.

When we run barefoot, we feel more connected with nature. Our brains are engaged. Our hearts are pulsing in our soles. This is the anatomical setup that makes movements like ChiRunning so popular. It presents a very real mind body link.

I suggest we all take some time now to indulge guiltlessly in the following foot porn.

It’s okay. You can do this at work.